Good Sunday to the Sixpack!

Week 2 definitely had less surprises than Week 1 in the SEC, but I think we all can be thankful that we don’t play in the Football Bowl Subdivision, signed Virginia Tech, Ole Miss, Kansas and whoever else the Stallion doesn’t really care about. The Stallion only focuses on cream and those teams are nothing but crust.

The Stallion also had to do a lot of extra highlight watching this past weekend, because of a 90th birthday party for my wife’s grandmother that forced me out of action. And by action, I mean sitting my rear end on the couch a la Heydog6 and watch a plethora of SEC games. So I had to miss the epic faceoff in the Colesseum as the Spaniard led his troops into battle to play “the games for the people” against the Georgia Bulldogs. I also missed the Gators embarrassing first half against the directional Florida school.

However, there was plenty of action to be caught beginning last Thursday night. The Mulldawgs still have to find a way to close out football games to get over the proverbial hump to taste a micro-version of cream. It may be a good idea for State to research “Stick ‘em for the WRs instead of producing its famous cheese.

And of course, there’s Bama being freaking Bama. Another year of hearing how the Bear is looking down with a smile at Saban’s boys to see them dominate their opponents is upon us. Even the Stallion has to admit the cream already seems to be separating even though it’s a long season and it’s only Week 2.

So is this a year to see who yearns for the runner up? In the Cream theory, it’s completely irrelevant, but to the readers of the board, every ranking means something. The Stallion’s crystal ball is very fuzzy below Bama. In fact, the infrastructure that supports the cream has as many cracks in it as Vanderbilt’s coach, Robbie Caldwell’s office chair. So suffice it to say, there is much movement and volatility as the cream is being established.

And before I get into Week 2’s rankings, I wish all of my Bulldog fans a very safe trip down to Baton Rouge to experience what I am sure will be an awesome home opener. It should be electric. But I won’t “church” this game up any more than that. The Stallion fully anticipates a fired up Bulldog team to go into Tiger Stadium and compete. I can’t remember a year since the late 90s where the Stallion isn’t showing some signs of nerves. The Stallion believes it has a little to do with a coach that reminds him of Gomer Pyle – “Shazam” and a starting QB that is as decisive as the Stallion’s 2-year old at picking which flavor ice cream he wants.

And now for Week 3 rankings.

Alabama – As a buddy of mine pointed out, "Why does Joe Pa not wear a head set? Why doesn't hejust quit." The real reason why Joe Pa didn’t wear a head set while coaching is if you had to figure out how to stop a rolling ball of muscle at RB, you don’t need anyone from upstairs telling you to get your defense to gang tackle No. 3. Plus the humidity in Alabama in early September combined with wearing a tie and a head set is brutal when you are 105 years old.

South Carolina – And all this time, the Stallion thought Lattimore was nothing more than an R&B singer. And as the Spaniard QB fired up his troops, he said, “At my signal, unleash hell!!!”.

LSU – Is only one player from making a strong run at the cream. Unfortunately that player is the QB. Ouch!!!

Auburn – Cam Newton has a ton of potential. He reminds the Stallion of a faster, smarter, more accurate JaMarcus Russell in his first year. I guess saying it like that he doesn’t remind me of JaMarcus at all.

Arkansas – You struggle against the artist formerly known as Northeast Louisiana, you will struggle to stay close to Alabama in the Cream Rankings.

Florida – 5 turnovers override another very sloppy game for the Gators. The Stallion predicts another early retirement for Oscar Meyer.

Georgia – Does anyone else get a Crockett vibe when watching Richt coach. The Stallion probably just showed his age.

Mississippi State – Moves up one notch not showing the Stallion that they are dangerous and will upset a couple of the top seven this year to make a bowl.

Kentucky – No rhyme or reason for moving them up except they are 2-0 and taking care of business so far.

Tennessee – Played Oregon strong for 2.5 quarters, but the Stallion will again eat crow this week about the Vols. The lack of depth will hurt the Vols this year. I still think the Sixpack is wrong on Dooley though.

Ole Miss – You can bet your pants that Jacksonville State will be scheduling Tulane next year.

Vanderbilt – Best line of the whole night while watching this game – “Those punters will need an IV at halftime”. – Herm Edwards

Hot Boudin – South Carolina – Spurrier’s boys may finally be climbing to the peak after a big win that has haunted the “Ole Ball Coach” for years.

Cold Couscous – Tennessee – Yes Bubba and Lulu, your team was heavy underdogs to the Pac 10 favorite, but the reason why you are the laughing stock in Week 3 is that you were tied 13-13 in the 3rd quarter and managed to get embarrassed by 30 plus points by those pot-smoking, computer stealing, face-punching environmentalists from the NW. Embarrassing.